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Title: Dastardly Schemes and Drastic Measures by Hayseed
Fandom: Harry Potter
Pairing: Hermione/Snape
Categories: humor, post-canon (and clearly written pretty early in the series)
Length: Epic
Warnings: consistently incorrect use of proper punctuation when turning a non-plural noun into a possessive (yes, you use apostrophe s, even if the singular form of the word ends in an s. Grr. Sorry. Pet peeve.)

Author on LJ: hayseed_42 
Website: http://www.obscurusbooks.org/html/Hayseed/index.html

Long-term Order partners Hermione and Severus are suckered into attending a wedding, where they are faced with a matchmaking Harry and Draco. Fortunately, Hermione and Severus are more than capable of taking care of themselves. Banter, hexing, more banter, and quite a few dastardly schemes and drastic measures ensue.

I'll say it right up front: Harry and Draco are OOC, Molly is deeply annoying, and the plot is bare bones. If any of those are deal breakers for you, you should probably bail now.

That said, the Hermione and Snape in this fic are nothing short of brilliant. Until I read this fic I would have never imagined it would be possible to keep Snape as caustic and sharp as he is in canon and yet still write a believable, enjoyable romance, but Hayseed pulls it off with aplomb. The main reason for this is her characterization of Hermione, who is a little sharper and more sarcastic than her Hogwarts-era self (as would be expected after seven years partnered with Snape) and who is also Severus's equal in every possible way (a novelty to me, after reading hundreds of Harry/Snape fics, where Snape is nearly always smarter, more experienced, and more dominant in the relationship). The two characters play off of each other brilliantly, and their interactions are a delight to read whether they be facing Harry/Draco PDAs, obnoxious children, wedding-planner Molly, or a bar full of vampires.

If you are a fan of sarcastic!Snape, if you enjoy relationships between equals, or if you just really like reading two people who are completely, if uniquely, compatible, this is definitely the fic for you.

Dastardly Schemes and Drastic Measures


( 30 comments — Leave a comment )
Aug. 24th, 2009 04:47 pm (UTC)
Hayseed is hayseed_42.
Aug. 24th, 2009 04:48 pm (UTC)
Aug. 24th, 2009 05:29 pm (UTC)
Useless grammar info: yes, you use apostrophe s, even if the singular form of the word ends in an s - not in Canadian English - Gus' not Gus's
Aug. 24th, 2009 05:37 pm (UTC)
Really? Huh. Maybe this author is Canadian?

Though, about 90% of Americans seem to get this grammar rule wrong, so it's hard to tell. It's doubly frustrating because if you say it out loud, it's very clear there's an extra s in the word (i.e., in America, if you were going to say "that's Gus's book", you definitely would sound out that second 's', rather than have the sentence sound like "that's Gus book").
Aug. 24th, 2009 06:51 pm (UTC)
Other grammar info: (this is from English English writers) was sat instead of sat/was sitting, what do you call the tense?
Written English is just as diverse as spoken English. God, what a mixed-up language!
Aug. 24th, 2009 06:55 pm (UTC)
Don't ask me -- I suck at remembering which part of speech is called what (especially since there's often a lot of fluidity in which one you use). As a native speaker of English, however, I know which word is the right one to use, because it's the one that sounds right when you say it out loud.

Frankly, I have no idea how people manage to learn English. Other languages are basically neat and orderly -- English is a disaster all around.
(no subject) - jane_elliot - Aug. 24th, 2009 06:57 pm (UTC) - Expand
Aug. 24th, 2009 06:26 pm (UTC)
Yes. Most Canadians use Gus' in stead of Gus's, but I've always felt Gus's looks more aesthetically pleasing.
Aug. 24th, 2009 06:29 pm (UTC)
But when you're speaking, do you say "That's Gus book" or "That's Gus's book"?
(no subject) - meishali - Aug. 24th, 2009 06:32 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - jane_elliot - Aug. 24th, 2009 06:33 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - rawa_02 - Aug. 24th, 2009 06:45 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - jane_elliot - Aug. 24th, 2009 06:48 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - rawa_02 - Aug. 24th, 2009 06:56 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - jane_elliot - Aug. 24th, 2009 06:58 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - rawa_02 - Aug. 24th, 2009 08:58 pm (UTC) - Expand
Aug. 25th, 2009 11:03 pm (UTC)
no, Gus' book would be correct in American english as well. it's the Gus's thing that's new - fairly recenht, and it makes me a little bit crazy - not that that's anyone else's problem.

look here: http://grammar.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/marks/apostrophe.htm

it spells it out pretty clearly.(with you on the red pen)
Aug. 25th, 2009 11:09 pm (UTC)
Wow. This means that college level grammar class I took was entirely wrong -- I'll have to pass that on to my prof:)
Aug. 25th, 2009 11:49 pm (UTC)
i think it depends on which way a person learned it. the s-apostrophe is the original, yeah, but the s-postrophe-s is gaining ground. i just think it looks funny and sounds weird. like gooses instead of geese. the English, it is dying!

so, others... they're/their/there, you/your/you're, it/ it's/ its',lose/loose... makes me wanna cry.

Aug. 26th, 2009 12:03 am (UTC)
It's hard for me to get upset about grammar shifting in the direction where what is written is what is actually said -- that's the purpose of grammar in the first place. What does bother me is when grammar shifts due to people not knowing what they're actually saying. "Might of" when they really mean "Might've" just drives me bonkers.
Aug. 29th, 2009 12:32 am (UTC)
Hey, have you read A Year Like None Other? It's a super-long, completed Snape adopts Harry story, gen, excellent writing, very well paced: http://www.potionsandsnitches.net/fanfiction/viewstory.php?sid=1284 The only downside is it's too long to use the print story option, but I think it's also posted in other locations where your fic downloader thing would work. It's really well done. And has a shorter sequel covering the following summer, and the author plans to write another sequel covering year 7.
Aug. 29th, 2009 12:43 am (UTC)
I haven't read it yet, but it's already in my to-read folder (also -- 5 MB? Holy *crap*!)

Aug. 30th, 2009 05:29 am (UTC)
Yeah, it took me four days to read it. That's unheard of! On the other hand, I have this series in which Harry turns into a cat that I still haven't finished. Damn thing's too long, I can't remember how this started or why we're here or anything! ._. But yes, give this one a try! They sequel covering the following summer is actually a bit annoying, since it's from Draco's pov roughly half the time and he's a whiny bitch, but it's still a good story.
Oh, cat story: http://www.intertexius.com/_index-harry-potter-fanfiction-and-art.html It's Snarry, though. Hm. Actually, the more I think about it the less I like it, but the cat stuff is adorable, so ... hm.
(no subject) - jane_elliot - Aug. 30th, 2009 08:28 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - gwendolynflight - Aug. 31st, 2009 10:43 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - jane_elliot - Sep. 1st, 2009 03:29 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - gwendolynflight - Sep. 2nd, 2009 02:52 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - jane_elliot - Sep. 2nd, 2009 02:58 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - gwendolynflight - Sep. 2nd, 2009 03:05 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - jane_elliot - Sep. 2nd, 2009 03:08 am (UTC) - Expand
( 30 comments — Leave a comment )


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